The honeymoon is over in Ambergris…

I’m beginning to dislike Ambergris with a considerable passion – The loud, obnoxious, drunken tourists, the mooching locals, and the petty thieves. Oh, and did I mention the so-called ‘music’? I swear to God that if I hear another reggae tune I will quite literally puke.

Regarding the drunken tourists, they were already warming up at 9:30 this morning, and they are at about middle gear presently. By 6:00 o’clock they will be in full bloom – and voice – and another sleepless night will ensue.

The obnoxious set includes women, who are probably the loudest of all. No shrinking violets these. The men are generally loud, but the women go out of their way to be loud, hooting like banshees.

Re: The mooches – Hardly a day goes by when I am not approached by some sad-faced mooch asking for a handout. Today there are two separate women making the rounds (mother and daughter, I suspect). They are carrying some sort of letter – in the same handwriting – and even assailed me in the restaurant at lunch.

And then we have the thieves. You daren’t put anything down no matter what it is, or whether they can use/sell it or not. Someone swiped the cord for my 17” computer off the veranda – which only fits that model – plus two cans of bug spray. The result is that they have doubled my work.

The 15” will allow me to continue writing, but the keyboard is smaller –causing typos – the screen is smaller, and it is waY slower. In addition I have to pack everything up each time I move out of sight.

I am also nervous about working outside after dark, but to work inside involves putting the computer on the walker seat and using the bed as a mousepad.

All this because some self-entitled punk stole a power cord he/she can’t use.

I hope to be able to leave the island on January 5th/16 (I’ll bet Christmas and New Year’s Eve are going to be a noisy hell!)



Why me, Lord?!

From this distance this catamaran looks small, but the mast is about 30′ tall. It’s a beauty, but I’ve only seen them take it out a few times.

I think they must have left the doors open at the Belize Zoo, today. From some idiot that was trying to start a fight at the sports bar next door, to some black woman whose entire vocabulary consisted of “f*ck” interspersed with a word or two of pigeon English.

Needless to say, you could hear them all over the island, but nothing is done quietly here. Even talking on the telephone is done at 110 decibels (the level of a rock band!)

Then, if that wasn’t enough, a pack of rug rats decided to use the front yard as a playground.


Why me, Lord?!

Temp: 26C with an onshore breeze.

I am now a paid-up, temporary citizen, of Belize…

Well, I am now a paid-up, temporary citizen of Belize (until Sept 29th, that is.)

It was not without its challenges, however.

The dirt alleyway. Surprisingly it isn't the slums. It's more-or-less average.
The dirt alleyway. Surprisingly it isn’t the slums. It’s more-or-less average.

The first was finding the revenue centre which is up a dirt-alleyway, only to be faced with a set of STEEP stairs. Verdict: NO F’ing WAY!

There was no f'ing way that I was going to risk these stairs just to pay the government money!
There was no f’ing way that I was going to risk these stairs just to pay the government money!

Being a government revenue agency, however, I was certain they would have a way to get this done, so I sent my cab driver, Jose, upstairs to inquire.

Yes, I could send Jose upstairs with passport and money ($50 BZD) and they would stamp it. Now, Jose was from the hotel and highly recommended, so up the stairs he went and I became a temporary citizen. 🙂

fish cleaning standThe 3rd photo is of a fish-cleaning stand. The chap in the red sweater is Tony, and he and his partner (opposite) have a thriving fishing-excursion business – enhanced by their own lobster traps ($600 BZD).

When they return, they clean and cook the fish and lobsters and have a shore-lunch at Jambel’s (the patio-restaurant I frequent.)

A frigate bird.
A frigate bird.

Needless to say, with all the fish guts etc. being tossed around, the birds – frigate birds, gulls, and pelicans have a feeding frenzy (photo #4). I am amazed by the size of the frigate birds. Originally I thought they were the size of gulls, but they are much bigger.

A wondrous bird is the pelican; his beak can hold more then his belly can!
A wondrous bird is the pelican; his beak can hold more then his belly can. I don’t how in hell he can!

The 5th picture is “Herman” the pelican. He has his own perch, and woe to any gull that dares occupy it. 🙂